Marriage Ceremony

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[Breaking of Bread][Oath and Seal of the Covenant][Drinking the Covenant Cup]
[The Changing of Names][The Covenant Meal]

(Delivered by Pastor)
    The (Mysterious) Marriage Covenant

 
   Each person is endowed by God with certain gifts, talents, and strengths.  As one strength is not greater or better than another, so one person is not a greater or lesser person.  Each is created by God, being endowed with their unique gift.  It is always important to remember that the greatest gift of all is the one that you need at the time.  For example, if one person is an excellent mechanic but knows very little about finances while another is a financial wizard while knowing very little about mechanics, who would we say is the greater person.  It all depends upon the current need.  There is no greater or lesser, we are all simply unique and different.  We are all made the way we are, fashioned by the hand of God, to accomplish that purpose for which we have been sent forth into the earth. 
 

     To accomplish his own purpose in the earth, God often joins together two completely opposite persons together.  If two people, having different strengths and weaknesses are joined together through the marriage covenant, each becomes greater than the two had been individually.  Truly it could be said that the two have now become one flesh.  This is perhaps one of the greatest mysteries of God's creation.  Failure to understand God's purpose in the marriage covenant often leads to the two individuals thinking that they are better off alone. 
 

    Very often the strengths of the one partner is not truly understood and recognized by the other.  These might often seem to be folly for him or her.  They naturally do not have any interest nor appreciation in such things.  They begin to think that they simply do not have anything in common any more.  They may begin to think that their spouse has become more of a hindrance then a help.  The two can often be blind to the strengths which they have as being united together.   Often the two may fail to realize God's purpose in bringing them together through the covenant of marriage.  When the two are brought together and bound together in a marriage covenant by God, they are bound together to fulfill God's purpose upon this earth.   Their own goals and ambitions are now to become secondary.  God's promise to the two of them is, that if they are faithful to him and to each other, he himself shall give them the desires of their heart.  It is only God who really knows the purpose for which he has brought them together.  For this reason Jesus declares, 

(Mat 19:6 KJV)

   Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. 
   What therefore God hath joined together, 
   let not man put asunder. 
 
 

(Gen 2:18 KJV)

     And the LORD God said, 
   It is not good that the man should be alone; 
   I will make him an help meet for him. 

    The need for the marriage covenant is not always known or clearly understood by the two parties.  The covenant is based upon the strengths and weaknesses of the two parties.  Apart from each other, they can never fulfill the plan of God for their lives, for each is interdependent upon the other to accomplish the marvelous plan that God might have for their lives.  Apart from each other, they will set themselves to accomplish their own goals or to satisfy their own desires.  But together, they somehow become a marvelous new creature.  The two now mysteriously become one flesh and one new person.  Apart from each other they are allowed to see only half of the plan of God for their lives.  Together, as they continue to draw closer in intimate relationship, they begin to see both halves of God's plan for their lives.  It is as if one person has eyes without hearing, while the other has ears with no seeing.  Together they can both see God and hear him.  Apart from each other, even though God might reveal the entire plan for their life, they can never truly succeed in accomplishing that plan.  This is because both of them are missing certain gifts and talents which they need to complete the whole plan of God to succeed.  On the other hand, together they can rely upon the strengths, talents, and gifts of their partner.  Together they can succeed and achieve the great plan of which God himself has ordained and has preordained for their lives.  This is the true purpose and intent of the marriage covenant.
 

     Because the husband and wife are both strong and weak in different areas, the strengths of the one might often be perceived as threatening to the weaknesses of the other.  This fear often begins to manifest itself by the two competing against each other for leadership in the home.  Each party, beginning to feel that their individuality is becoming threatened, now strives to lift himself (herself) just a little above the other.  It is not right that the husband exalts himself over his wife, neither is it proper for the wife to lift herself above her husband.  What is proper and ordained of God however, is for each party to recognize that they two are no longer two separate individuals, but have become one new living creature.  Their two voices are to be united as one.  There two minds are now to merge themselves into one.   Their cannot be two minds combating against each other and striving, the one against the other, for God has declared:

(Luke 11:17 KJV)

   Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; 
   and a house divided against a house falleth. 

    For this reason, each must recognize that when such a situation occurs, it is in their unity, the one being forever bound to the other, that they are strong.  It is in their agreement that they are able to stand upon solid ground. 
 

    What does it mean to be husband and wife?  It seems that God has given and joined the two different minds, so that they might bounce their thoughts off of one another until they arrive at the best decision.  Should an instance occur when these two minds can not come to an agreement, ultimately the one must have the final authority.  That one as ordained of God is the husband.  This does not mean that the husband is always right.  Often, when the two minds cannot agree, the husband's final decision might be the wrong decision to make.  When the husband is confronted with two choices, he might not always make the best choice, but this does not alter the fact that it is ultimately his choice to make, with him alone rests the final decision.  This being said, it is also declared unequivocally and indisputably, that a husband who gives no ear to the thoughts of his wife is as a king who refuses to ask council of his advisors, both of these men might be rightfully labeled a fool. 

 (Prov 12:15 KJV)

   The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: 
   but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise. 
 

(Prov 15:22 KJV)

   Without counsel purposes are disappointed: 
   but in the multitude of counselors they are established. 
 

(Prov 19:20 KJV)

   Hear counsel, and receive instruction, 
   that thou mayest be wise in thy latter end. 

    If a husband and wife can not come to an agreement of such things before they enter into the marriage covenant, they should not think that they will be in agreement afterwards.  If a man marries a woman knowing from the beginning that she will strive against him for dominance in the relationship, knowing that it is by divine decree that he himself is the one whom God has ultimately placed in position as the final authority, that man is not very wise.  His future wife has revealed herself to be a great source of trouble for him.  Let him then not continually complain about her afterwards.  He has foolishly chosen his troubles.   On the other hand, if a woman marries a man who obviously has no respect for her thoughts and council, the man has beforehand revealed that he is a fool.  Let that woman then refrain afterwards from her complaining about her husband's mistreatment of her, for she has knowingly chosen to marry the fool.
 

     The purpose of the blood covenant is to bind two individuals, families, or tribes together.  The covenant was cut in blood to demonstrate that it was to be an everlasting covenant.  The life or spirit of a man, according to the scriptures, is said to be in the persons blood itself. 
 

(Deu 12:23 KJV)

   Only be sure that thou eat not the blood: 
   for the blood is the life; 
   and thou mayest not eat the life with the flesh.

   The intermingling of blood represented that, not only were these two to be joined together in the flesh, but in the spirit as well.  Although the physical life ends after only 80 or so years, the spirit lives on throughout eternity.  A blood covenant represented a greater union and duration then one's own physical existence, it represented an eternal bond between the two bloodlines.  In a blood covenant, the two bloodlines were believed to be merged together into one.  This ritual implied that the two families had become joined together as equally as the two covenant representatives.  In a marriage blood covenant, the two families become joined together, not only the two representatives.  This implies that even after the death of both covenant representatives, the families continue to be bound together by blood.  In essence, one could say that spiritually, their two bloods have become one.  Not only do the two individuals become husband and wife, but their two families become joined together as well.  This is a union which is never meant to be broken.
 

    Typically in a blood covenant two representatives must be chosen to represent the two tribes or families entering into covenant together.  In the case of a marriage covenant, the two representatives of the covenant are naturally the husband and the wife.  These two in a sense represent the two families be joined together through a blood union.  The two families are now to be regarded as one.  This is true in both in a spiritual and physical sense.
 

     The covenant site is often chosen especially so that it may be an everlasting reminder of that day that the two covenant representatives cut the blood covenant.  The marriage covenant site is often the local church, that is in most Christian marriages.

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The Walkway of Blood

(Ceremony to be Narrated)

    In ancient covenant practices a sacrificial animal was often slaughtered to denote the surrendering or laying down of the individual's life for the other.   It was to be understood that as the animal has sacrificed his own life, likewise the husband and wife pledge their lives to each other, even if it means that it might one day cost them to lay down their life for the other.  It speaks of a loyalty and commitment to each other.  It is unfortunate that this concept has been almost altogether lost in our Americanized culture.  In a Christian marriage their is no need for an animal to be slain to demonstrate this concept of love and devotion.  For the Christian, Jesus is the Lamb of God, slain from the foundation of the world.  It is his blood which we bring into this marriage covenant rather than the blood of bulls or goats.

(Rev 13:8 KJV)
   ... of the Lamb 
   slain from the foundation of the world. 

   The slaying of the sacrificial animals left a pool of blood.  The two entering into covenant would often stand in the midst of the pool of blood, their bare feet being immersed in the warm blood of the slain animal(s).  It is while both were standing in this  pool of blood that the ceremony would take place.  The blessings and curses were usually stated while standing in the blood.  It was understood that each representative would do his utmost to perform the vow of the covenant, even if it should cost him the same price that it has cost the sacrificial animal, the shedding of blood and the very life of the creature.  This was to ensure that the blessing would come to the other party, no matter what it might cost.  When the curses were pronounced, the slaughtered animal would represent the cost to each party for willfully breaking the blood covenant.  Because tribes were joined by such blood covenants when trust and faithfulness were of paramount importance, the curse was pronounced.  The willful breaking of the blood covenant would initiate the beginning of a tribal war or feud.  To willfully break the covenant meant that the guilty party must be slain as the sacrificial animal had been slain.  Each family or tribal member was responsible to carry out the penalty upon the other tribe.
 

    Most often the blood would run down the center, dividing the two families or tribes.  In this way it would cause a red line between them, like a river of blood dividing the two families.  In our common wedding ceremony we will see sometimes a red carpet (sometimes white denoting purity) run down the center aisle of the church.  On one side of the red carpet sits the family, friends, and relatives of the bride.  On the other side of the blood line would sit the family, and friends of the groom.  At the end of the ceremony, the husband would sometimes stand in the center of the blood, picking up his bride, and carry his new wife from the bride's side of the blood, over to the husband's side of the blood line. This was referred to as the threshold covenant, the groom carrying the bride over the threshold represented his removing her from her old place of habitation to her new place of habitation.   In other wedding customs the bride would leap over the bloody threshold to signify that she has left her old family and dwelling place to become joined to her new family and new home.

(The Ceremony Begins)
 

(  The Walkway of Blood  )

( The red carpet is rolled out to signify the blood of the covenant.  In a Christian marriage, the bloody sacrifice is the Lamb of God.  We are reminded that in spite of our humanity and sinfulness, we have been washed in the Blood of the Lamb.)

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The Exchange of Coats

    In the marriage covenant, the wife removes her old covering representing her old identity and authority.  This act is followed by the putting on of her husband's covering.  She now has a new identity, that of her husband.  From here forth the two are to be regarded as one identity.  Her old identity is gone.  She now wears the identity of her husband.

    The wife brings her strength and power into the marriage by willful submission to her husband in everything.  She offers all that she is to her husband through her willful submission to him.  This is not to suggest that the wife is weak.  On the contrary, her submission is a sign of her great strength.  The willful  act of submission of the wife to her husband is perhaps the greatest challenge a wife shall experience throughout her marriage.  This must be by the willful act of her own will.  The husband is not to force this submission from her.  The gesture of her bowing down to him as unto the Lord is meant to be a symbol of her willful submission. 

    The husband is regarded as the person of rank, power, and authority.  He is the Lord of his marriage and the King of his home.  He is not to abuse this position of power and authority but rather to always use his position to demonstrate a love for his wife and his family.  As the wife is called upon by God to lay down her rights and privileges in submission to her husband as Lord and Master, the husband is called upon by God to be willing give up his own life for his wife and his family. 

    What does this ultimately translate into?  What then is the responsibility of a husband to his wife?

  The groom takes her by the hand and brings her up to her feet.  Afterwards, he removes his cloak and cover his bride. 

   The two continue walking in their different directions until they reach the end of the walkway.  At the end, they turn and face each other.
).

     Often the weapons or weapon belt is exchanged in a blood covenant ceremony to symbolize the transference of one's strength and power to the other.  In a Christian marriage covenant, the wife is said to be the weaker vessel, the husband being regarded as the stronger.

     The sword has long been the symbol of a man's power and strength.  In the marriage covenant, the husband is sworn to protect his wife, although it might cost him his life.  When the husband gives his sword to his wife, it is a gesture which suggests that all of his might, strength, and power has now been given to his wife.  She need but ask of him and his power shall be made immediately available to her. 

    Because her husband has become her Lord, her enemies have now become his enemies.  He is sworn to fight against her enemies, to protect her from the evil which might launch an attack against her. 

    Blood covenants included certain and peculiar Promises, Blessings, and Curses.  The promises would include any peculiar vows that one party wished to verbally express to the other.  This they did in the sight of God and all their friends and family.  Promises especially included vows of faithfulness, loyalty, and dependability.  Blessings consisted of those good things which God himself would shower down upon each party if they remained faithful to their blood covenant.  Curses were sometime pronounced to remind each party of the great responsibility which was theirs to remember their covenant and to do what was expected through faithfulness and loyalty.  To be unfaithful was to incur the wrath and curse of God as often stated publicly during the covenant ceremony.   In today's' marriage covenant there can be no rightful curse uttered for Jesus Christ has redeemed us from any such curse being made a curse for us. 

    While it is true that their can rightfully be no curse brought upon us because of our marriage vows, we have every right to expect that the many blessings pronounced upon us for our faithfulness to our marriage vows will come upon us.  At this point in time we shall declare that all such blessings are to be set in motion.  This practice insures that our marriage will have no curse associated with it, but that only manifold blessings of God shall come upon us and overtake us. 
 

    The bread represented the body.  The bread covenant always represented a temporal covenant which had as its primary focus this physical life.  The breaking of the bread naturally represented the breaking of one's physical body.  The bread was broken and offered to the covenant partner to be eaten by the other.  This symbolized that everything that the person was physically, his property, his finances, his physical strength, would all be willingly offered to the other as needed.  The one would be willing to lay down his own body to protect the life of the other.  At times even greater than this, the words would be spoken, I will give my body to be eaten before I will  allow you to starve.  As a bread covenant was physical, it was also temporal.  It could only be of power as long as physical life remained.

    The major part of the blood covenant begins with the oath and seal.  There comes a time when the two stand in the midst of the warm blood of the sacrificed animal and pronounce an oath to each other, before their friends, and especially before God.  The hand is often lifted up to heaven as a pledge to keep the terms of the covenant.  Often the hand that is raised will be sealed with the mark of the covenant.  In ancient days it was believed that the "ring finger" of the left hand was connected directly to the heart of the individual.  The covenant mark would often be engraved upon this finger.  The officiating priest would take his knife and cut a ring around the finger capturing the blood into a glass.  This mark would be done on both covenant representatives.  Afterwards, that bloody wound would be rubbed with black gun powder or a similar substance which would cause the scar to become more pronounced as a ring around the finger.  In later days a gold or silver band would be used to cover the scar.  This became the origin of the covenant ring from which we get our current ring customs.  The marriage ring represents a seal and reminder of the marriage vows once partaken.  The engagement ring reminds one of the promise to wed.  The friendship ring reminds us of our special friendship which we share.  A promise ring brings to remembrance the promises which we have made.  All such rings find their origin in the blood covenant scar which was made by the cutting of a blood covenant.

 The priest now takes the knife and pretends to cut the ring finger.  He then takes the glass from the child to pretend to catch the groom's blood.  He hands the glass back to the child.  The priest calls for the cup bearer to bring the glass of wine for the catching of the bride's blood.  The child walks down the path of blood bringing forth the glass. 

 The priest now takes the knife and pretends to cut the ring finger.  He then takes the glass from the child to pretend to catch the brides' blood.  He hands the glass back to the child.)

    The blood represented the spirit and life force within the body.  As the bread covenant represented a temporal physical covenant, the blood covenant represented a covenant which could not be annulled even after physical death as it brought both spirits into an eternal covenant relationship.  When the covenant cut was made by the priest, the blood was captured in a glass usually containing water or wine.  Afterwards, while standing in the pool of blood, the contents of the two cups of blood were mixed together represented the intercomingling of spirit natures.  The symbol represented that the two had become one, not only one flesh, but one person and of one mind.  Christians are warned that the actual consumption of human or animal blood is expressly forbidden by God.  This is because it is strongly associated with the power of Satan and Witchcraft.

    As a Christian, we initially enter into a blood covenant with God through the eating of Christ's body and the drinking of his blood.  To refuse partaking of this communion meal means to refuse Christ.   It is the blood of Christ which we partake of in a Christian marriage rather than the blood of animals or humans. 

( The priest walks down the walkway of blood to get the glass which contains Christ's blood.  He returns, lifts up the cup. 

 Priest (to all):  This cup contains the blood of Christ. 

 The priest now takes the glass from the first child and mixes the contents into the glass of Christ.  He next takes the glass from the second child and mixes the contents of that glass into the glass of Christ.  He now presents the glass to the bride and groom to drink.

 Priest (to both):  This cup contains the blood of your covenant.
    Take it and drink it. )

    The blood covenant ceremony often includes a transfer of names.  The families would often assume the others name.  This was often represented by means of a hyphen between the old name and the new.  This change of names indicated that the two families had now become one new family.  In a marriage covenant, the wife would exchange her maiden name to take upon the name of her husband.  This again goes along with the realization of the new identity but also becomes a verbal memorial of the covenant.  Each time the wife is called by her new name she is reminded of the marriage covenant.  Each time the husband hears his wife called Mrs. ????, he is reminded that she has become joined to him and they two have become one new flesh. 

  The covenant meal of peace was a feast which followed after the covenant ceremony.  It was to be partaken by all to celebrate the covenant and to encourage the spreading of peace between all members of the newly joined family.  It is meant to be a time of fun and joy so that all might have lasting memories of this day which we have been invited to celebrate together.

( Covenant Meal ) 

 Priest (to all):  Please join us to celebrate this marriage covenant 
    by partaking of the covenant meal of peace. 
    The party will be held ..... 

The Bride and Groom begin to make their exit.
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